It's all About Perspective...

I rarely blog 2 days in a row. I honestly don't think I have that much to say to capture your attention that often. But this... this just needs to be shared.

Last night in Ironwilled: Women who TRI (yes, there it is another plug, stick with me) I posted this picture....

It was posted with a message to keep this in mind when you start seeing and hearing about other's training. We are each on our own path. Stay true to your plan, your race, your goals!

I had to learn this the hard way and Jason (#mycoachisadork) had to beat it in to me. My race, my training, my plan. Don't try to keep up with others. Don't worry about others. Worry about you. I used to say I was putting my blinders on to focus on me and not compare myself to others. It's soooooo hard! DUH...just like life!

We got some snow in Atlanta this morning. My sister posted this awesome snowman she and her son built once school was canceled.

 

What a cool snow man! Wow, how much snow did you get?

 

And then she posted another picture....

 

Oh....not that much, huh?

 

And then another....

Oh.

It's all about perspective.

 

Especially as triathlon season kicks up (and life continues) keep this in mind. Your friend who just spent 3 hours on his trainer may be going to Puerto Rico for a 70.3 in 2 weeks. The woman in your group who just ran 20 miles this weekend and is doing the same race as you in 6 months might have a marathon coming up.

 

You do you and remember....

 



A Decision has been Made....

As you may or may not know, my first coach and I broke up after Ironman Florida. I started shopping for a coach but then decided I was going to proceed without one, at least for awhile, at least until April (6 months out from IM Louisville). After all, my relationship with my coach was the steadiest relationship of my recent adult life and I needed time to grieve. Just kidding, I needed to save some pennies and figure out what I wanted in my next coach, if there was going to be a next coach. I digress....

The decision to proceed without coaching was purely financial. I expected some major income changes to come my way and knew that coaching wasn't going to be an optional expense I could afford.

Before this decision to proceed without a coach was reached, I spoke to a handful of different coaches. Some I reached out to, some reached out to me. Some were easier to talk to than others. Some seemed more interested in working with me than others. I was very put off by a friend's coach that I reached out to who, at one point, was talking to me, and then when I said I'd like to talk about coaching never returned my message. I felt like another coach I was chasing to see if it could work. Then there was Brant from Dream Big Triathlon Coaching. He is in Indiana and was very responsive to my questions and took the time to chat with me.

I let Brant know in December that I wasn't going to be going with a coach for now. Financially it wasn't a commitment I could comfortably make. He alerted me to a contest on his coaching page where he was giving away a free month of coaching and asked me if I would like him to enter me in it. SURE!

In January I got an email: You won a month. Want it?

I let him know I was headed to Dopey and he agreed we'd get started after I recovered. He kept tabs on my progress and we chatted some after. He encouraged me to do stuff that was fun. I spent the 2 weeks after Dopey spinning, yoga-ing, running with friends and masters swim.

Then it was time to get started.

Brant gave me some great workouts. Wrote them in a way I hadn't seen before (learned something new) and kept me moving. Even in 4 short weeks, I learned from him.

While working with him it became very apparent I do better working with a coach. I am starting to get into coaching myself, but even the best surgeons don't operate on themselves. Things that were supposed to happen in my personal/professional life didn't (yet) and I realized I would be able to continue on with coaching after all.

Now the decision: a virtual coach (long distance) or local. My first coach was local. That was the relationship I was used to. I'm thankful that Brant gave me the opportunity to experience a virtual coach.

I weighed out the pros and cons. The options were: stay virtual and continue on with Brant and Dream Big Triathlon Coaching or find someone local. There was an amazing thread in Ironwilled: Women who TRI about the pros and cons of each (like how I plugged that?). For me, the decision was to find a local coach: a coach I could get an in person skill session from if needed. Someone who knew the roads I would ride and could really guide my workouts to best prepare me for race day.

By the suggestion of my metallic haired sister from another mister I was going to speak to a coach she recommended. Knowing both of us, she thought we'd work well together. I was planning to seek him out, but hadn't had the time yet.

Then last week I walked in to my favorite ice cream store bike mechanic's shop to pick up my new-to-me bike rack and as fate would have it, he was there. He stopped what he was doing and we talked a bit. I was sold when he said: I read your blog. I've read your race reports. I understand what this sport means to you and that the process is just as important to you as race day.

Woot-woot! I'm completely ecstatic to announce I'm going to be training with Brent and DYNAMO MULTISPORT!!!

How else does one celebrate than with a posed photo op!

So now the question remains....Does he know what he's gotten himself in to????

0 to B!tch in 14 minutes

If you remember early last week I announced I was done with online dating. I deleted my accounts and removed any apps from my phone. I also told a couple different people I wasn't interested in communicating any more.

One guy was a guy named Tim. He would send me a message, I would reply and I would hear nothing from him for a week or two. We almost met on Superbowl, but that didn't happen and I didn't hear from him for another week. I told him I wasn't interested in someone who could only remember I existed once in a while. Plus, we had been talking for over a month and I was not looking for a text buddy.

Yesterday was Valentine's Day and I felt loved and appreciated as I a few friends reached out. I'm sitting at brunch with my folks and I get a text from a number I don't recognize. You know, the best way to tell this story is to just post it:

 

As you can see, I decided to play along for a little bit. But then, I was done.

 

 





 And then I wasn't amused anymore.

I mean, I'm annoyed. I'm frustrated. I don't like being in the complete dark. And that's where I was...I Googled the number. I entered it into Facebook to see if it was connected to an account. No luck with either. I think this was about the time I posted his phone number on my Facebook account to see if one of the people I'm connected with knew who it was. I even tried calling a friend of mine who is a police officer to see if he could trace it. More on my Facebook post in a moment.

 

I often joke with friends when the tell me they Facebook stalk me that it's okay. It's nice to have stalkers because then I know I'm never really alone. HOWEVER, I can joke because it's never really happened to me. I say I live my life out loud (a lot of it's public). He crossed the line when he played the Stalker line. Not funny.

 

I'm pissed off. I'm a bit freaked out. And he wants to know if I want to hang out? Despite all this I still managed to reply with my favorite line of the week: No, thank you.

 

Later in the evening, one of my friends on FB comments, "Hey, That's Tim." Crazy.

 

Want to meet me? Want to maybe date me? Don't be an asshole. WTH was this guy thinking? What the hell are most of these guys thinking? I'm pretty sure I made it perfectly clear I wasn't amused. I'm so pissed off at this jerk that I almost left his phone number on the screen shots as I promote this blog throughout the cyber world.

 

Meanwhile, I'm leaving his self identifying information up, because he earned it.

 

End of rant.

 

 

I Give Up...

I quit. I'm throwing in the towel. I'm raising the white flag. I'm taking my ball and going home. I'm taking my clubs and moving to Cleveland (I had a manager that used to say that all the time).

I'm retiring from online dating. I know this disappoints many of you as the anecdotes will be limited, but I assure you, if I stuck with it, I'd be shopping for a mental institution.

Means by which I have tried to meet  someone significant since I've turned 30: It's Just Lunch. Match. Eharmony. Plenty of Fish. OK Cupid. Jdate. Tinder. Craigslist (I'm not proud, but true). I have disabled all of them. I think. I hope.

I'm not ready to completely give up on dating because I do try to be an optimist about it. But, let's be real for a moment...the last 2 guys who REALLY took an interest in me (other than 5th Date and well. that's another can of worms) in the past 4 months were both attached. One is Facebook official and the other is MARRIED. MARRIED. WTH? I confess, I got caught up in the attention. It was flattering. But it's wrong. I'm not that girl. Wow, lots of confessions today apparently. I was that girl. One time, loooong time ago. It never felt right. It always felt wrong. Never again. Never. I'm completely offended that he thought I was 'that girl.' When I finally told him to stop, he was stressing me out, he said he was just joking with me. I assure you if I share pictures he sent or screen shots of what he said to his wife, she wouldn't find them funny. Again, he reminded me he was just joking. Maybe he is trying to convince himself.

Additional conversations I have had in the past 24 hours:
Mr. Maintenance...I called him that because he kept in touch just enough to keep my attention. I've been hanging out/dating with him for about 15 months on and off. Finally last night I decided I was done. This is the same guy who a few months ago after being out with me the night before sent me a text the next morning saying he needed a break. It was my turn. I sent him a text. (Fair's fair. Right?) I assured him I wasn't mad at him but I have never been a priority to him and I never will be. 7 hours later he texts me. I reply. He wants to know what I'm up to. I tell him that I'm just off my bike and I need to shower and eat. He asks me if I want to come over. I say no thanks. He says ok. Guess he didn't want to see me that much.

Then there's Mr. Screen Shot. I shared a bit about him yesterday on Facebook. He's the guy who told me that he would not be buying my dinner when we met up. I told him then it wasn't a date just 2 friends meeting up. He says so it's a date if I pay? I said yes. This plus many other things had red flags waving high, but you know, I'm slow on the uptake. I give him the benefit of the doubt. He suggests we meet in Midtown. I counter with Perimeter. He asks for Kennesaw. Fine. I pick a restaurant he says Ippolitos. I said fine. A few more exchanges last night and I'm about to hop on my trainer so I tell him I'll catch  up with him later. He replies, maybe. (Arrogant SOB). We catch up this morning. Random topics of conversation, nothing exciting. He asks if I want to meet on Thursday at Chuy's (my original suggestion he rejected). I replied I thought you said Scallini's... and living up to his name.... (he's yellow, I'm bluish)

So no more. If you know someone you think I should meet. Sure! Why not? I have one requirement: He must be single: LEGALLY, MORALLY, ETHICALLY, and EMOTIONALLY. And one request: You actually think we will get along. We should have more in common then we are both single.

Tonight I have dinner with a guy friend. I have no idea if it's a date or not. I do know it will be fun. And that, is all that matters.

What Now....

Mind if a brag for a moment? I mean I really need to share this with someone. Today I ran 10 miles. I know you are thinking, "So what? That's what you do." But, but, but in the three weeks since Dopey, I've run a TOTAL of 7.5 miles. Yes, I've been swimming and spinning. It's such a surreal feeling to know I can pull a 10 mile run out of my back pocket. It helps when you're running with a friend who talks as much as you do. And you stop a few miles in to chat with friends you've crossed paths with on the Silver Comet Trail. But I did it! And damn if TG doesn't like to park where we have to run up a hill at the end.

The most horrible selfie ever taken of me and Tshirt Guy

Ok, back to the life updates...

A couple of months ago I was shopping for a new triathlon coach. After talking with a few and thinking some personal changes were going to be happening, I decided to not select a coach at this time. However, one of the coaches I spoke to said he was raffling off a free month of coaching, would I like to enter? Sure, why not. Not like I've won anything recently. I jest! I had a very lucky year which is one of the reasons I did not enter the Kona lottery. I was afraid I would win.

Anyway... Brant from Dream Big Triathlon Coaching LLC contacted me and told me I'd won a free month. SWEET! I tell him I have Dopey. We both agree to wait to get started until after I'm fully recovered from it. The time has come. I'm STOKED!

Other things that happened this week. Ironwilled, LLC was formed and filed or is it filed and formed? I was accepted and registered for the Level 1 USAT course in Nashville. I signed up to learn how to teach adults to swim. Lacrosse season started (#whistlewhileyouwork).

I had a date. I think I'm now the Vice President of my homeowners association board of directors, or something like that. I burned myself at Starbucks.

I think the most exciting thing to report on was that I got 11 hours of sleep Friday night. I know I need to get out more.

I'm guessing most of you won't read this because I'm publishing it during the second half of the Superbowl, but sometimes, I just like to yammer about.

If you actually read this far and you missed last week's about volunteering, you should check it out. I had a blast with Stacy at the Hot Chocolate 15K/5K volunteering.

Have a great week!